Glazed

I hail a cab, blinking "On Call"
Then I realize that I was alone,
I was nearer to boredom now than ever before
Like a little doll outgrown by who used to be a little girl

I'm Neglecting

I don't work on this blog too much. I tried to like it, but the site is simply blogs-only that I don't really like it that much. I'm neglecting this little piece of cyber suburbia that I put my stakes on.

I feel like a glutton na tuloy.

So I promise to post stuff here as much as possible, maybe twice weekly. This blog will purely be my non-kikay blog, as opposed to my multiply blog where I put all the pseudo stupid things I do everyday.

I promise to keep you up to date my blogger blog. Sorry I'm neglecting.

20 is no Different from 20

Yep, tomorrow, actually just a few moments from now I'll be turning 21. I'm trying to think of things that changed about me and I came down with quite a number. Sure, I became independent and I'm now working, I've learned the value of hardwork and have realized just how fulfilling it is to receive money that I have really worked for.

I have learned that even if I always follow my heart, there is a reason why my head is fashioned to be on the topmost part of my body. That all things that will have a great impact in my life need to be carefully thought over.

I have learned that even the smallest step can change my life in ways I can never imagine. I have seen many things, done many mistakes, kept many good memories. But I have learned that not all my experiences I need to tell other people. That not everyone will want to listen and that sometimes baring my all is not the way to go.

I have learned that keeping my life an open book is not always good. And that those who say that they are open books say everything that is really nothing of what is everything. They hide more than you think.

I have learned to trust people, to understand them, to give them a break. But I only do so once.

I have learned that anger will do no good, that diplomacy is the best way to go.

I have learned that my thoughts are more powerful than anyone's word. That nothing really matters as long as I have done right. That although the presence of a God will help, His presence is not necessary to determine what should be done at any given circumstance.

I have determined that Body Shop is my best friend.

I have not lost myself in the melange we all call "Real Life". That I am still who I was, only better, maybe a bit wiser.

I have learned that mistakes are not wrong.

I have learned that reinventing myself will take time, but it feeds my spirit to build myself to something better, something stronger for what may come in the future. I may not be as dramatic as other people, but I know that when I look at myself in the mirror I can with no regrets or doubts say:"That is the Emillene Jean Torres I want to become, but I can be better than that woman in the mirror."

So hello, Midnight, hello. My name is Ems, and I just turned Twenty-One.

Panacotta, Please

I watched this advertisement for World Food Programme were different African people, young, old, male, female, all skin and bones, were saying favorite desserts like they were ordering it from the restaurant. Then it said that for the price of your dessert, you can help feed people in Africa, many of whom are dying of starvation.
It sound weird at first, yes. But when you calculate, let's say you have a sundae 4x a week. That's Php30 per week and a total of Php120. In one month, that's Php480 all in dessert. In one year, Php5760 is devoted all to just dessert. That Php5760 can be donated to the World Food Programme to feed many people and maybe, although just a bit, help save the those starving people.
Other than that, it doesn't really count if you have dessert. They are merely luxuries, especially after you have already eaten one full meal. A friend, who's been making donations to the World Food Programme for almost a year now, said that whenever he has the urge to get dessert, he stops himself and keeps the money instead and deposit it every week. It doesn't seem huge when you give it weekly, so you don't feel the dent in your pocketbook. This same friend now eats desserts only when he has done something really good, like get a promotion, or when he's broken hearted. Haha
I'm planning to do the same thing. I usually have like cake in Starbucks, or a donut whenever I feel like sugar rushing. But I will now try to save the money to give to the World Food Programme. I may even lose weight because of that. It's my own way of giving back what I got.

Videos, Videos

The last entry was pretty fun and funny for me. We were on break and decided to goof around. It was one of my co-trainees who took the video and I never thought he was serious, so I got into all this retarded thing with the hands. Anyway, like I said, it was fun.
However, there are many people who got bad experiences with videos. You know the whole lot ---the scandals (I'm sure you've seen atleast a couple), the exposes and the people whose lives were destroyed and maybe corrected because of those lenses that can never lie.
I watched this scandal once, an ADZU schoolgirl. I'm sure you've seen it, too (yeah, the striped panties). I didn't feel anything but pity for the girl. She was young, pretty, and well, while she may be a bit too experimentative at a young age, her video scandal can only get comments from two kinds of people:

1. Those who have had sex and think it's okay but pities her because she wasn't careful enough, didn't choose her men well, etc. and;
2. Those who never had sex, never enjoyed the intimacy and envies her but outwardly shows it as disgust or anger. Frigid people. How sad.

I am not a nun. I think pre-marital sex is okay. I do not encourage it, but it's okay. I may even venture to say that the video-ing is okay, too. I met a few couples who do it for themselves, to spice things up. Who's to blame them? I'm not into those who are promiscuous though, but do you have to be promiscuous to video your lovemaking? I do not think so, folks. But I really hate those A-holes who distribute sex scandals and destroy other people's life. It's immature. That is what is disgusting.
To those who feel like I do, let's spread the word. We all want sexually active people (or not) to be protected from abuse, disease and discrimination. Come to think of it, Sex is like Death, that is where we are all going to, sooner or later. And do we hate people who die early?